Parenting Questions Answered - The Best Age To Have A Baby

I have been asked many times lately about my thoughts on "the perfect age to have children".  My answer is always that there is never a "perfect" time to have a baby.  I personally wanted to be done having babies by the time I was 30, and we started trying a year after we got married.  I had just turned 22 when my oldest was born.  Within 4 1/2 years we had our 3 babies and I am 99% sure we are done - that's a topic for another day.

There are pros and cons to starting a family both earlier or later.  For me, fertility issues run rampant in my family and I wanted to give ourselves the time we may need.  I am extremely thankful that we got pregnant quickly and easily with each one.  I also don't know how long I am granted here on earth, so I wanted to have our babies young so that I would have as much time with them as possible.

With that being said, we had just built and moved into our brand new "starter home" when I got pregnant.  I quit my job right after I had him.  Had we been a bit older, we could have had more "stuff" and taken more vacations.  As it was, we didn't and I was excellent at being cheap frugal.  But we were still blissfully happy and I was/am able to stay home.

I have always had a bit of an old soul and knew without a shadow of a doubt that I wanted to be a mom.  Just because starting a family young worked with us - doesn't mean it will with everyone.  Some people simply aren't ready for the stark reality that comes with a screaming newborn.  Some couples want those years alone to get to know each other more before adding to the mix.

The answer will be different for every couple.  What works for some, doesn't for others.  Some people want to be more financially stable, while some throw caution to the wind.  Others don't have a steady relationship as early as we did and don't find their significant other until later in life.  How about you - When did you start a family?

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10 comments:

Lindsay said...

We began dating at 15, moved away from home and in together after graduating from high school, bought our first home after college graduation, were engaged at 21 and married at 23. We had our first (and only so far) son at 25. We've always been old souls, too and, obviously, got an early start on everything else. Ha! I would like to try having another within the year. This way I'll have 2 and won't even be 30 yet, so if we ever decide to have a third...we'll still have plenty of "time."

latanya t said...

I had my son at 28. It was two years after my husband and I got married. They are so many variables that can go into planning or not planning for a family.

Jenna said...

We had the same thought - we thought it would be nice to have all our kids by the time we were 30. I am now 30 and have been blessed with three wonderful children. We got married young at age 22, but waited to have children until we were both done with college. Once we were, that's when our daughter was born, then 2 years later our second child, and then 2 years after that...our 3rd. I agree that for each person it's different depending on their own situation. For us, this worked out perfectly!

Ronalee said...

My first pregnancy was not planned at 19. Thanks to a false positive test result I stopped taking my birth control and became pregnant (thinking that I already was). We were both working and I think we did a good job regardless of our ages.
Ideally I would have waited until I was married with a savings account and a house before we started our family.

bunnyswagg said...

Started a family when I was 16, also married at 16 and now with four kids later I couldn't be happier.

Anonymous said...

Did not get married until I was 33, so any desire to have kids young was out of my control. I am 35 and having fertility issues while my friends who were lucky to marry younger are done having kids. Unfair, but that's life.

MaryAnn said...

I agree their really is no perfect time. I had my son when I just turned 22 and my daughter is due anytime and I am now 25. The only thing I can say is not too young. I have seen 15 & 16 year old's in my family getting pregnant left and right and I have seen the difficulty this is to them.

Maria Iemma said...

I have three kids. The first one I had when I was twenty and the other two 13 years later. I have to say that I enjoyed my kids no matter what my age however when I gave birth to my second and third children I was able to be more relaxed

stacy said...

We started around 23. If I could redo I would have maybe waited until age 27. We have three kids now and enjoy them all!

Wendy Jabkowski said...

My first was at 29 and I loved it because we were financially able for me to stay home from work.

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